Anxiety Or Depression

I am so fucking depressed, I don't want to live anymore?
I'm 15 years old and in 10th grade. I've always had Generalized Anxiety Disorder, but I only found out a few months ago. I am going to the doctor in about a week about that. Over the past month or so, I have just felt SO empty and worthless, and like everything is so pointless. Seriously! Everything seems so pointless I feel like I literally can't do my homework or even hang out with my friends. I started a new school this year. I really hate my new school.. just everything about it. Anyway, my main "friends" there are these girls 4 girls.. In a way I feel close to all of them, but in a way I also kind of hate all of them. I can't even explain it. It's a really small school though and I can't think of a group I would rather be friends with instead. I've never felt this alone in my life. My dad isn't living with us for this year because of work stuff.. My mom is kind of depressed about that I guess, and she just always complains and she just seems sad. She used to depress me to be around, but now nothing really depresses me because I'm just permanently depressed. Yesterday, I kind of cut myself for the first time.. just a few scratches..it's not deep at all, barely even a cut. Yeah and today I was feeling so depressed that I faked sick to stay home from school. The thing is I guess I'm so depressed and miserable that my parents believe that I'm sick and they're not even gullible. I'm going to stay home again tomorrow. I just really can't face school atm. I really wish I didn't have to live anymore. I wouldn't commit suicide, but I also wouldn't care if I died. The worst part is that I have no hope anymore that my life will get better. I don't even enjoy anything anymore. It's like there's nothing making me depressed, I just am, so why would I get better? The last time I felt genuinely happy even for a short period of time was probably this Christmas festival thing in 2010 I went to with my old friends. Honestly every time I felt happy since then has been tainted with anxiety or depression. And in the past couple months, I haven't even felt like smiling once. I just seriously can't deal with this. I don't even know what to do.. Just please give me some advice or something? Thank you. Also I'm a girl. Just in case you can't tell from my name.. And read what I fucking wrote. I know my life isn't that bad, and nothing that bad happened to me, but I am still really depressed and I can't help it. wow. i'm surprised at how much worse i feel reading these answers. why did i even post this question.. I have to talk to my dad almost every single day, and it is really depressing because he's really depressed.. it isn't his fault he can't live with us, it's his work. Actually I think my whole family is depressed because my 19 yr old brother is also depressed because he can't find a job and recently he got kicked out of the place he used to go with all his friends for underage drinking, so now he practically has no social life either. Yup I was right. No one really understands! Goddamn it.

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Weirdest thoughts. Please help!?
It came up into my mind just last night n now I can't let go of it, this is probably the weirdest thought in my mind. Ok a few days ago I was looking at pictures on the Internet about the human mouth and tonsils and the uvula because I was looking at signs of inflated tonsils cuz I was scared that maybe mine where inflated but they are not they are small and I don't need to get them removed lol thank god, then I looked at my mouth in the mirror and saw my tonsils and the uvula and the hole where food goes down and now I keep thinking about how it looked like and that it's inside my mouth, all that stuff in my mouth looks scary even though I already know that it's normal and everybody has that in their mouths including animals but I keep thinking about it please help me am I going crazy I tell you the stupidest weirdest thoughts are in my mind does anybody know what I'm talking about do other people have these thoughts, is this some kind anxiety or depression thing or am I just crazy please real answers this is scaring me I also have thoughts of hurting people even though for sure I won't do it, what can I do to stop all these stupid don't make sense thoughts?

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